Peaceful Parenting Seminars



For pro-active parents who want the very best for their children.


Genevieve's Parenting Seminars are informative, thought provoking and entertaining, as well as providing an emotionally supportive atmosphere for parents to ask questions and "compare notes" with other parents. She delivers content in a way that is easy to digest with simple tools, tables, and techniques and lots of handouts for parents to take away. She shares examples from her personal and work life that demonstrate how these approaches have worked so well for herself as a parent, as well as examples from families she has helped. Parents who attend tend to enjoy the light hearted, yet heart felt, style of the presentations. And there's always time to ask questions and meet and talk with other parents!

In these seminars, Genevieve shares her in-depth study of many experts in the fields of early childhood development, attachment and neuroscience, as well as her experience in helping clients develop these models over the last 20 years and as a parent practicing these skills for 16 years. Genevieve offers models that clarify the differences between traditional parenting practices and the peaceful parenting model. She teaches that parents don't need to resort to using coercion, threats, punishments or manipulation but they do need constructive tools to use instead! Many of the communication skills that parents learn have the potential to improve all relationships in the family, fostering trust, active and respectful listening and healthy conflict resolution skills. Parents gain an understanding of the development of the child's emotional intelligence, they learn approaches that increase the child's self-esteem, self-discipline and ability to identify, name and express their feelings and needs in healthy non-aggressive ways.. Click here for more about the key principles of Peaceful Parenting.

Below is a list of some of the seminars that Genevieve offers.

For more information and/or to enquire about the Peaceful Parent Institute running a seminar in your area click here to email
or ring Genevieve on 0064-9-4343542 or Cell phone; 0064 27 4179198


The introductory seminar (Discipline without Punishment)

This seminar offers an overview of the basic principles of peaceful parenting, giving a deeper understanding of why children behave the way they do, what drives cooperation and what drives aggression. Parents learn some invaluable communication skills, that can effectively be applied to improving all relationships! This Parenting Course offers both useful tips and skills, as well as emotional support for parents, who themselves need much empathy and understanding as they explore the parent child dynamic.  Some of the topics covered are:

  • Meet your child’s needs for secure attachment
  • Active listening skills (starting from birth)
  • Positively deal with children's defiance
  • Maintaining clear limits while maintaining emotional connection
  • Help your child overcome fears and anxieties
  • Develop Emotional Intelligence in your child
  • Deal with your child’s aggressive behaviour


"Something I gained from the Peaceful Parent workshop was a remembering of what it's like to be the child, this was very powerful for me. I also gained a reconnection to my self as a mother. There were quite a few key points that really resonated with me, that felt fundamental and were things that I had either missed or didn't know. Another thing I liked about the whole experience was how it brought me back to my parental awareness, a place I want to come from with my parenting and relationships in general"
Megan, Waiheke Island, NZ



The importance of attachment and attunement in a babies first year of life: 

(for related reading, go to our books page under the products tab)

  • How can I best meet my child's attachment needs?
  • How to repair birth trauma for mum and baby? 
  • What's are the alternatives to sleep training? 
  • What's the best nutrition for babies and young children? 
  • Why do babies’ cries often trigger so much anxiety?
  • What are the best ways to respond to our babies’ cries? 
  • How can babies release their stresses?

"What I gained from the Parenting workshop was HUGE!! I gained deeper empathy for my babies and how it must feel for them to be dependent on me. I gained the sense that it's ok being who I am and also that I must try harder to be more conscious." Liz, Auckland, NZ.


How to talk so kids will listen:

* What are the alternatives to yelling, time out or threats? 
* How to talk so kids will listen and listen so kids will talk?
* How can I best foster my child's emotional intelligence?
* How do I deal with my child’s aggressive behaviour? 
* How can I teach my child to be considerate of the needs of others? 
* How can I know when my child’s upsets relate to previously traumatic experiences? 
* How can I help my child release stresses and fears?

"When I was at the seminar, I have to admit that I was doubtful that these techniques could bring positive results with my five year old son, but I'm constantly amazed at how quickly he calms down and actually starts to listen to me when he can see that I'm really listening to him and I can see how much more confident he becomes when he sees that I'm really there to help him and support him. I've seen him as such a little fighter, but now I can see that he's just been trying to show me that he needs to see and feel my support and belief in him." Annie, Whangarei, NZ.


Raising Drug Free Kids:

Based on the book by Dr. Aletha Solter, Raising Drug Free Kids takes an innovative approach and focuses on preventative measures that can be developed early on in a child's life to equip children with the qualities they need to make healthy choices, especially throughout the challenging adolescent years.

The talk will draw largely from Dr Aletha Solter's book "Raising Drug Free Kids" providing parents with simple, easy-to-use tools to build a solid foundation for children to say "no" to drugs, alcohol, peer pressure and other unhealthy foods or influences.

Parents have much more power on the subject that they realize, these talks are very empowering for parents and the younger your child is the better.

Dr Solter is a developmental psychologist and parent educator and Genevieve is a Certified Instructor of her work.

"On the one day parenting workshop, I gained a sense of possibility that big things for, not just me and my kids, but all relationships and for the planet can be moved. I liked the ease of how we learnt together, the clean clear cohesive teaching that chewed through a lot of ground. It's given me an understanding of the deeper causes for behaviour, the big picture, intergenerational/ planetary progress, so many creative tools for helping my kids with where they are at and what they will go through." Laurence.



The Problem Solving Model – Learn to mediate children's conflicts with each other in a way that helps them take responsibility and gain confidence in communicating well through conflicts

When conflict arises, our children look to us to learn a healthier non-aggressive model of dealing with problems. This mediation approach equips children with problem solving skills and relationship skills that will benefit them in all future relationships!

Come along and learn some positive approaches to better respond to your children's squabbling, disagreements or full on fighting.

Parents find that these approaches both work better and better meet the needs in the family. When children are fighting it doesn't help to leave them to their own devices as they haven't yet developed the relationship skills to constructively deal with these situations and it also doesn't help to come in and sort it out for them as that also doesn't teach them these necessary relationship skills.

Come along and learn the what the healthy model looks like and how you can apply it.

"This is one of those 'I wish I knew this earlier' things 'cause it works like magic. I use this with my kids and with other children I work with and I have been amazed at how quickly they 'get it' - kids are such natural wee problem solvers" - Tabitha

"I attended an evening talk and a full day workshop and I've gained the tools to help me parent without anger or punishment and an understanding of that real need to connect and help my child release her emotions through my love and support. I liked the openness and connections felt within the group, discussing these issues with like-minded parents. It's given me more information about how I can parent in a loving and supporting way without anger and punishment." Sam, Oct '09


Please email_us if you're interested in booking one of our courses or weekends or if you'd like to organize one to be run in your area.


Peaceful Parenting to create a more peaceful world.

Key Principles: The concepts and approaches that participants are presented in our Parenting Seminars are based on a combination of attachment parenting, active listening skills, parenting through connection, heart based wisdom (listening to your heart and your child's heart), problem solving skills and a deeper understanding of children’s emotions.

On the seminars and workshops, Genevieve gives information and examples from her years of working with individuals, children and families. She also shares her in-depth study of the work of Dr. Aletha Solter, psychologist and author of “The Aware Baby”, “Tears and Tantrums” and “Raising Drug-Free Children”, the work of Daniel Siegel, psychiatrist, author of “Parenting from the Inside Out”, John Bowlby's Attachment Theory, Bruce Perry, founder of the Child Trauma Clinic and others in the field of cutting edge research in child development.

More about the Peaceful Parent Philosophy:

As opposed to focusing on the child's behaviour in isolation, we give a broader understanding of the dynamics between parent / educator and child. The mood between the parent and child is the main factor in determining a child’s “good” or “bad” behaviour. Although using rewards or threats may work in the short term, we teach that adopting a punishment free approach to parenting is a key factor in establishing relationships that are based on trust and mutual respect and for creating a good team spirit in the family. Most parenting techniques that focus on controlling the child's behaviour through threats, bribes or punishments elicit obedience rather than willing co-operation. We outline some of the pitfalls of the coercive techniques. 

Not only is there an alternative to punishment, it is the only alternative that leads to long term peace and harmony in families and effectively meets children's emotional needs for emotional safety, security, developing emotional intelligence and fostering unconditional love.

Not only is parenting without punishment an option, but it is essential to supporting the child to make choices from a place of integrity rather than fear of disapproval or desire for reward. Creating a culture of mutual respect, listening, sensitivity to each person's feelings and diplomatic problem solving fosters communication in the family that's based more on integrity, respect and compassion.

Adopting a democratic mutual problem solving approach to parenting lifts both the adult and child out of the power struggle!

Our approach differs to many more traditional approaches in that parents are taught to relate primarily to the feelings beneath the behaviour and to respond primarily to the feelings. Many parenting approaches focus on changing a child's behaviour using techniques that involve time out and creating artificial consequences for the child.

In the talks and workshops, we explore some of the negative side effects of approaches that involve punishments, threats or bribes. One of the simplest negatives is that we teach our children through modeling first and foremost, hence when we get children to act the way we believe they should act through manipulation, threats, bribes and punishments of any kind, we are teaching them that this is how they should be in relationships, this will become their mode of making others act the way they want them to act - they will naturally think and feel in terms of manipulating, bribing, threatening and punishing. If they are then being advised by their parents not to attempt to manipulate others (coercion), the child is receiving two opposing messages, one from their parents words, the other from their parent's actions and day to day communication with the child.

Clear patient communication: The overall approach being presented is a much healthier model based on clear and patient communication and trust in the child's basic goodness. Limits are set by the parent with confidence, giving the child a very clear understanding of what the limits are, while remaining in a warm connected and supportive relationship with the child. It is a model that constantly models a much more mature form of communication. These approaches foster connection, confidence, trust, lateral thinking, problem solving skills and conflict resolution skills. It is a model that aims to both meet the needs of all involved, parent and child and also teaches flexibility and adaptability..

Aggression, hyperactivity and the speaking with "whining" tones in children are generally symptoms of the child's need to release their pent up stresses and frustrations. When we can give children the safety and permission to feel and express their feelings, children can return to balance and again live happily in the moment. When children are emotionally settled and calm, they naturally can give their full attention and enthusiasm to their daily play and learning. On the other hand, the child who carries a backlog of invalidated and unreleased tears and fears is less available mentally and emotionally and will be generally frustrated, unsettled or inhibited.

The parent's need for emotional support and release is just as big and just as valid as the child's and the first is actually a pre-requisite for the second. For this reason, we also offer understanding about how the patterns from the parent's own childhood influence how we parent as adults. Although most parents endeavor to parent with patience and kindness, all parents understand that putting the principle into practice is no easy task and it's unfair to "expect" ourselves as parents to just be calm and non-critical without a lot of learning, support and quite a lot of processing of our own emotional hurts.

Recommended Reading:
 
Genevieve and Dan recommend interested participants to get hold of some of the books on our Books page. They are all books that work from a similar value system of non-violent communication, parenting without punishment and parenting through connection. We particularly recommend one or more of the books of Dr. Aletha Solter. Dr. Solter is a Swiss/American developmental psychologist and author of four parenting books. Dr. Solter is recognized internationally as an expert on attachment, trauma, and non-punitive discipline.  


Genevieve is the only Certified Aware Parenting Instructor in New Zealand, the Aware Parenting Institute has instructors in over 60 countries. Dr. Aletha Solter is an internationally recognized expert in the field of child psychology.  Solter holds a Ph.D. in psychology, has led workshops in nine countries and is the founder of the Aware Parenting Institute www.awareparenting.com.  She is the author of four parenting books, The Aware Baby, Tears and Tantrums, Helping Young Child Flourish and Raising Drug-Free Kids.

Based on cutting-edge research and insights into child development, Dr. Solter's "Aware Parenting" concepts question most traditional assumptions about raising children, and proposes a new approach that can profoundly shift a parent's relationship with his or her child. Parents who follow this approach raise children who are bright, compassionate, competent, nonviolent, and drug free.

Some of the key aspects in Aletha Solter's books are the acceptance of emotional release, awareness of babies' and children's vulnerability to stress and trauma, recognition of repressed emotional pain as a contributing factor in many behavioural and emotional problems, recognition of the healing effects of laughter, crying, and raging, respectful, empathic listening and acceptance of children's emotions.

Aware Parenting also supports natural childbirth and early bonding, plenty of physical contact (including night-time closeness), breast-feeding, prompt responsiveness to crying, sensitive attunement, and non-punitive discipline -- no punishments of any kind (including "time-out" and artificial "consequences"), no rewards or bribes, searching for underlying needs and feelings, non-violent communication, peaceful conflict-resolution (family meetings, mediation, etc.).

These seminars and coaching_sessions offer an invaluable opportunity to take an objective look at the real issues and the real potential within your parent child relationships.

The courses offer a time to take a deeper look at your feelings and needs as a parent or caregiver. We cannot effectively meet our children's deeper emotional needs if we have not met our own emotional needs. Despite our deep desire as parents to give our children the very best that they deserve, the reality is that until we learn healthier ways of interacting, we continue to act and react out of deep rooted patterns and beliefs ingrained in us from our own childhood years. Understanding this actually allows us to have more patience and compassion for ourselves as well as giving us the hope that we can indeed change the patterns.

Changing Old Patterns of Behaviour: Through Genevieve's counselling work with adults and children, she has a deep understanding of how challenging, as well as how rewarding, the process of changing our parenting patterns can be. The reality is that for a parent to parent from the heart in a kind hearted manner without using punishment, a parent needs to have access to the correct information and some support in putting it into action. For most parents, being calm, patient and clear enough to parent in this way is easier said than done. It is a state that is reached through a journey of learning and increased self awareness.

Change happens slowly, one step at a time: Parents can be very hard on themselves if they revert back to their old methods of yelling and using punishments and threats despite having read a positive parenting book or attending a course. They can either give up on themselves or on their new methods. Parents need to understand that they can't change decades of conditioning overnight. Even though parents often revert back to old unhealthy habits, with new information and support parents can observe their behaviour in a new way, have a better understanding of exactly why the old behaviour is unhealthy and have an awareness of what the healthier alternative behaviour should be. Giving our kids the patience and kindness that they need and deserve is only possible when we are putting equal focus on learning to become kinder and more patient with ourselves!

It is extremely liberating to realize why you and your child act in the ways that you do and to realize that you can choose to create a more positive, empathetic and loving relationship for all concerned.

To parent, teach or be with children in a way that truly honours the child's sensitivity, emotional needs and individuality, we need to connect back emotionally and energetically with how we as children viewed and experienced our world. The deepest way to truly understand the needs of a child is through reconnecting with and remembering our own childhood. ~ Genevieve

Because Genevieve is also a professionally trained energy healer, she can clearly see the connections between the physical ailments that a child presents and the places in their body where the flow of their emotions has become blocked. She has a clear understanding of the direct connections between emotional health and physical health.

Genevieve says: "In my private practice, it warms my heart hugely to witness the huge benefits that families experience when parents learn a parenting approach of actively listening to and validating the child’s emotions."

For participants of our Parenting Seminars who are now ready to take their healing of their relationship with their children, their partner and their own self to the next level, we recommend attending one of the One Day Intensives or a Healing Our Birth and Early Childhood Weekend Retreats.


 


For more information about the seminars please send an email
or phone
0064 9 4343542 . Peaceful Parent Institute, PO Box 403023, Ngunguru, Whangarei 0154, New Zealand..

 

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