Parenting Seminars

Registration for workshops: For evening seminars in Forum North, please send an email or phone 09 4343542 to book your place. It is advised to pay for your ticket in advance as spaces are limited. You can pay by bank transfer into 12-3013-0660140-01 or send cheque payable to Peaceful Parent Institute, PO Box 403023, Ngunguru, Whangarei 0154, New Zealand. Phone 09 4343542

To book your place at the Natural Phenomena Conference 2010, click on their website.

To book your ticket for the evening talk in Ashburton College Auditorium, phone 03 3088461 or send an email

For pro-active parents who want the very best for their children. These talks and courses are also very helpful for health care professionals, teachers, caregivers, therapists and anyone who works with children.

Courses that ran in 2009:
(watch this this for upcoming courses for 2010 or join mailing list on home page)

Wellpark College
Introductory Evening Talk
Friday 14th August 7 – 8pm
Wellpark College, Francis St.,Grey Lynn
Cost:      FREE

Titirangi, West Auckland:
Discipline without Punishment
Saturday 15th August 10am- 4pm
Titirangi Community House, Titirangi village
Cost:  $50

Healing Relationship Patterns: click here
Date: .. Fri 28th August 7pm - Sun 30th Aug 4pm
Venue: Sharda Retreat Centre, Tuakau, Sth Auckland
Cost: .. $400 incl tuition, food and accommodation

A series of seminars in Forum North, Whangarei in September, October and November 2009

Tips and Tools for raising happy kids!! 
Wednesday 9th September, 7pm to 9.30pm.

Tickets: $15 per night, incl. tea/coffee.
Bookings: phone 4343542.
If tickets bought online, you're name will be on the list at the door on the night.

Parenting Seminars in Yoga Orewa in October

Tickets: 09 4343 542 or 021 2979305
OR Natasha Rainger 09 427 5359 / 021 735 327

Venue: Yoga Orewa, 498 Hibiscus Coast Highway, North Orewa
natasha@bodyunion.co.nz

Overview of Peaceful Parenting Principles          
Thursday 29th October, 7 - 9pm Cost $15                                

Discipline Without Punishment
Friday 30th October, 9.30 - 12.30 Cost $30

Confident Kids –Overcoming  Fears & Phobias
Friday 30th October, 1.30 - 4.30 Cost $30

The introductory seminar (Discipline without Punishment) offers an overview of the basic principles and philosophies that form the foundation of our parenting courses and teaches essential positive parenting skills and invaluable communication skills that can effectively be applied to improving all relationships. This Parenting Course offers both useful tips and skills, as well as emotional support for parents.  Some of the topics generally covered are:

• Active listening skills
• Conflict resolution skills 
• Positively deal with children's defiance
• Set clear limits without creating conflict
• Help your child overcome fears and anxieties
• Support them to resist peer pressure
• Develop Emotional Intelligence in your child
• Deal with your child’s aggressive behaviour
• Meet your child’s needs for secure attachment

Genevieve and Dan offer a holistic perspective that fosters the child's emotional wellbeing and emotional intelligence. Parents learn what it means to parent in a kind, calm and peaceful manner, while maintaining strong, clear and fair boundaries for their children. This style of parenting nurtures the child's individuality and unique gifts, giving him/her a wonderful balance of being given both the space and the holding that they need to develop their highest potential.

The concepts and approaches that parents are introduced to in these Parenting talks are based on a combination of attachment parenting, active listening skills, basic counselling skills and a therapeutic (soothing) approach to emotions and also the work of many experts in the field, including author and child psychologist, Dr. Aletha Solter PhD. Genevieve is a Certified Aware Parenting Instructor, under the guidance of the Aware Parenting Institute. Click here for more about the key principles of Peaceful Parenting.

One Day Healing Family Patterns Intensive This one intensive is the next step on after the Introductory Seminar. Participants are given the opportunity to explore their individual parenting style based on the basic principles of Peaceful Parenting. It is a day to explore the patterns between the parent and their child and between the parent and their own parents. This day offers a combination of theory, meditations, writing exercises and sharing in pairs (always optional). It offers an opportunity to explore the deep seated emotions and belief systems that parents generally act from automatically when conflicts arise between parent and child. 

Many parents find that even once they've learned new and healthier methods of parenting, they still struggle with loosing their patience and staying calm and in control of the situation when their child is "acting out". Acting out refers to the unhealthy behaviours that children exhibit when they are out of balance. To fully clear old unhealthy beliefs from the subconscious mind, often it's necessary to make the changes at a deeper level. This course offers ways of accessing and changing the old patterns in a safe, supportive, uplifting and empowering environment. Click here for more about the key principles of Peaceful Parenting.

Mailing List: Please email us if you're interested in booking one of our courses or weekends or if you'd like to organize one to be run in your area (within New Zealand).

Peaceful Parenting to create a more peaceful world.

Key Principles: The concepts and approaches that participants are presented in our Parenting Seminars are based on a combination of attachment style parenting, active listening skills and a deeper understanding of children’s emotions.  Genevieve gives information and examples from her years of working with individuals, children and families. She also shares her in-depth study of the work of Dr. Aletha Solter, psychologist and author of “The Aware Baby”, “Tears and Tantrums” and “Raising Drug-Free Children”, the work of Daniel Siegel, psychiatrist, author of “Parenting from the Inside Out”, John Bowlby's Attachment Theoryand others in the field of cutting edge research in child development.

More about the Peaceful Parent Philosophy:

As opposed to focusing on the child's behaviour in isolation, we give a broader understanding of the dynamics between parent/educator and child. The mood between parent and child is the main factor in determining a child’s “good” or “bad” behaviour. Although using rewards or threats may work in the short term, we teach that adopting a punishment free approach to parenting is a key factor in establishing relationships that are based on trust and mutual respect and for creating a good team spirit in the family. 

Not only is there an alternative to punishment, it is the only alternative that leads to long term peace and harmony in families and effectively meets children's emotional needs for safety, security and unconditional love.

Adopting a therapeutic approach to parenting lifts both the adult and child out of the power struggle

Our approach differs to many more traditional approaches in that parents are taught to relate primarily to the feelings beneath the behaviour and to respond primarily to the feelings. Many parenting approaches focus on changing a child's behaviour using techniques that involve time out and creating artificial consequences for the child. In the talks and workshops, we explore some of the negative side effects of approaches that involve punishments, threats or bribes. One of the simplest negatives is that we teach our children through modelling first and foremost, hence when we get children to act the way we believe they should act through manipulation, threats, bribes and punishments of any kind, we are teaching them that this is how they should be in relationships, this will become their mode of making others act the way they want them to act - they will naturally think and feel in terms of manipulating, bribing, threatening and punishing. The overall approach being presented is a much healthier model based on clear and patient communication and trust in the child's basic goodness. It is a model that constantly models a much more mature form of communication. It is a model that fosters connection, confidence, trust, lateral thinking, problem solving skills and conflict resoltuoin skills. It is a model that aims to both meet the needs of all involved, parent and child and also teaches about being flexible and adaptable.

Aggression, hyperactivity and the speaking with "whining" tones in children are generally symptoms of the child's need to release their pent up stresses and frustrations. When we can give children the safety and permission to feel and express their feelings, children can return to balance and again live happily in the moment. When children are emotionally settled and calm, they naturally can give their full attention and enthusiasm to their daily play and learning. On the other hand, the child who carries a backlog of invalidated and unreleased tears and fears is less available mentally and emotionally and will be generally frustrated, unsettled or inhibited.

The parent's need for emotional support and release is just as big and just as valid as the child's and the first is actually a pre-requisite for the second. For this reason, we also offer understanding about how the patterns from the parent's own childhood influence how we parent as adults. Although most parents endeavor to parent with patience and kindness, all parents understand that putting the principle into practice is no easy task and it's unfair to "expect" ourselves as parents to just be calm and non-critical without a lot of learning, support and quite a lot of processing of our own emotional hurts.

Recommended Reading:
 
Genevieve and Dan recommend interested participants to read one or more of the books of Dr. Aletha Solter. Dr. Solter is a Swiss/American developmental psychologist and author of four parenting books. Dr. Solter is recognized internationally as an expert on attachment, trauma, and non-punitive discipline.  

Genevieve is the only Aware Parenting Instructor in New Zealand, the Aware Parenting Institute has instructors in over 60 countries. Dr. Aletha Solter is an internationally recognized expert in the field of child psychology.  Solter holds a Ph.D. in psychology, has led workshops in nine countries and is the founder of the Aware Parenting Institute www.awareparenting.com.  She is the author of four parenting books, The Aware Baby, Tears and Tantrums, Helping Young Child Flourish and Raising Drug-Free Kids. Genevieve is a certified Aware Parenting Instructor.

Based on cutting-edge research and insights into child development, Dr. Solter's "Aware Parenting" concepts question most traditional assumptions about raising children, and proposes a new approach that can profoundly shift a parent's relationship with his or her child. Parents who follow this approach raise children who are bright, compassionate, competent, nonviolent, and drug free.

Some of the key aspects in Aletha Solter's books are the acceptance of emotional release, awareness of babies' and children's vulnerability to stress and trauma, recognition of repressed emotional pain as a contributing factor in many behavioral and emotional problems, recognition of the healing effects of laughter, crying, and raging, respectful, empathic listening and acceptance of children's emotions.

Aware Parenting also supports natural childbirth and early bonding, plenty of physical contact (including night-time closeness), breast-feeding, prompt responsiveness to crying, sensitive attunement, and non-punitive discipline -- no punishments of any kind (including "time-out" and artificial "consequences"), no rewards or bribes, searching for underlying needs and feelings, non-violent communication, peaceful conflict-resolution (family meetings, mediation, etc.).

These courses and coaching sessions offer an invaluable opportunity to take an objective look at the real issues and the real potential within your parent child relationships.

The courses offer a time to take a deeper look at your feelings and needs as a parent or caregiver. We cannot effectively meet our children's deeper emotional needs if we have not met our own emotional needs. Despite our deep desire as parents to give our children the very best that they deserve, the reality is that until we learn healthier ways of interacting, we continue to act and react out of deep rooted patterns and beliefs ingrained in us from our own childhood years. Understanding this actually allows us to have more patience and compassion for ourselves as well as giving us the hope that we can indeed change the patterns.

Changing Old Patterns of Behaviour: Through Genevieve's counselling work with adults and children, she has a deep understanding of how challenging, as well as how rewarding, the process of changing our parenting patterns can be. The reality is that for a parent to parent from the heart in a kind hearted manner without using punishment, a parent needs to have access to the correct information and some support in putting it into action. For most parents, being calm, patient and clear enough to parent in this way is easier said than done. It is a state that is reached through a journey of learning and increased self awareness.

Change happens slowly, one step at a time: Parents can be very hard on themselves if they revert back to their old methods of yelling and using punishments and threats despite having read a positive parenting book or attending a course. They can either give up on themselves or on their new methods. Parents need to understand that they can't change decades of conditioning overnight. Even though parents often revert back to old unhealthy habits, with new information and support parents can observe their behaviour in a new way, have a better understanding of exactly why the old behaviour is unhealthy and have an awareness of what the healthier alternative behaviour should be. Giving our kids the patience and kindness that they need and deserve is only possible when we are putting equal focus on learning to become kinder and more patient with ourselves!

It is extremely liberating to realize why you and your child act in the ways that you do and to realize that you can choose to create a more positive, empathetic and loving relationship for all concerned.

To parent, teach or be with children in a way that truly honors the child's individuality, we need to connect back emotionally and energetically with how we as children viewed and experienced the world. The deepest way to truly understand the needs of a child is through reconnecting with our own childhood.

Healing our relationship with the children in our world truly can heal broken hearts and soften hardened hearts.

Because Genevieve is also a professionally trained energy healer, she can clearly see the connections between the physical ailments that a child presents and the places in their body where the flow of their emotions has become blocked. She has a clear understanding of the direct connections between emotional health and physical health.

She can see the obvious connections between a child's blocked emotional energy and blocks in their chakras, their body posture and natural movements of energy around the body. 

"In my private practice, it warms my heart hugely to witness the huge benefits that families experience when parents learn a parenting approach of actively listening to and validating the child’s emotions."

For participants of our Parenting Seminars who are now ready to take their healing of their relationship with their children, their partner and their own self to the next level, we recommend attending one of the One Day Intensives or a Healing Our Birth and Early Childhood Weekend Retreats.